Sometimes I want to cry and sometimes I don’t know why. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry over something so stupid, but its almost as if my tears have a mind of their own. When you want something you want it and sometimes you didn’t even know you wanted it until you got a taste. But displace this person, place or thing for even a minute and our hearts are open to the salt we rub in them. I’ll be the first to admit I have a tendency to overreact, a tendency that is cemented in some
simple form of truth. A fear that I cannot rationalize or understand but I know is there.
Then there’s the times when we don’t feel good enough, we don’t feel that we deserve this or that we’re worthy of it. All the while we still want it, as we let our feelings and emotions get the best of us day after day. Every little inconsistency can drive us crazy.
It makes me want to scream. It makes me want to be one of those people who can take three deep breaths and all is right with the world. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people. I throw my hands up time and time again and quit time and time again only to rejoin the game when the cards start falling in my favor. Someone show me that I don’t have to be that person. I need someone to show me that I can relax and take it as it comes and be as good as my persona is. Or maybe I just need me, and a little time to work out the kinks. Maybe, maybe’s all I got right now.
